I’m at a loss
at times after games like this to come up with something…anything, that’s
remotely remarkable about the game that, as a Michigan fan, you are obligated
to watch. However, I will admit that my
clicker was getting quite a workout as I kept flipping to see how Everett
Gholson was going to score for Arizona State next and also figure out if Auburn
was ever going to show up in their own stadium.
But more on ALL THAT in a minute.
The result of
the Michigan game if you’re a Michigan fan is almost perfect. They won, but the performance was so agonizingly
putrid that it left a bitter taste in every Michigan Fan’s mouth that I
know and should have removed any and all doubt that Brady Hoke needs to
go. Here’s the MooN shot that every
twitter account and sports blog posted at half-time of the game.
Yes, it’s
safe to say that Michigan and Northwestern showed their asses on Saturday. But at least NWU had an excuse.
No
argument: Michigan’s Defense has played
the last two games like warriors on a mission.
Michigan’s Defense has faced two of the worst offenses of the B1G in the
last two games, also, so please keep that in mind before you start singing any “Save
Hoke” praises. A Michigan Defense should
look like that when the opposing team is literally starting walk-ons on their
offensive line.
It’s still
the offense and the overall execution of the offense that truly baffles
me. Why are guys not catching balls that
hit them in the hands? Why are running
backs still not seeing holes that are so painfully obvious to the masses that
are watching this team week in and week out?
They HAVE TO SEE THIS STUFF
on film…Yet, still, the same problems persist.
They say you
play like you practice. Michigan
supposedly practices great…Me, I’m not buying it anymore. I want a “passes dropped in practice” count or something to convince me that
Michigan is actually practicing great.
Add to that a “Saw the Hole”
count and tell me what those are on Friday.
Then, we’ll know if it was a good practice or not.
So, heading
into the 2nd bye, Michigan stands at 5-5 with two games left. The first one is a coin toss. The 2nd one….well, it’s a rivalry
game and anything can happen. I just don’t
think 7-5 saves Hoke’s bacon…in fact, I’m praying it doesn’t. I can’t continue to watch games like that
when there’s better football EVERYWHERE to be seen on
Saturday. In fact, there were so many
great games with odd happenings, it makes me think that Halloween missed
college football by a week! So, let’s
get to
The Rest of the Mess (Spooky Saturday!)
I don’t know
where to start, so I’m just going to start.
If you haven’t been paying attention to the Gophers of Minnesota, well…They’re doing something they have
never done before. They’re beating teams
and beating them decisively – And they clobbered Iowa. Somehow, Kirk
Ferentz still has a job in Iowa even after blow-outs like the one the
Gophers slapped on him. Being a Michigan
fan sucks…Being an Iowa fan must feel like a prison sentence. Look out for the Gophers in the B1G West…They
are in a position to make some noise…What’s the world coming to?
Anyone
remember when Syracuse used to be
good in Football? Well, when Duke slaps you with a convincing loss…I
guess it’s time to think about B-Ball Season.
The “Big 6 Elimination Games”
All the games
that the collective world of College Football Junkies were calling the
elimination games either were mired in horrible play and turnovers, or just
terrible mistakes all at the wrong time.
Were the ghosts and goblins just having fun with some of these teams or
what?
Baylor goes into Sooner Nation’s home and hands them a Big Bag of Whupass….yep,
the “Fire
Stoops” websites are getting a spit-shine and the quiet collective that
has been calling for the Bob Stoops ouster will be out in force this week. Baylor is the new dominant force in the Big
12 and Oklahoma is an afterthought. Bob
Stoops as a Florida head coach may not be as far-fetched as some believe…But he
won’t be wearing Maize and Blue….Just don’t see that one happening.
As a Michigan
Fan, it really upset me that there were two WAY more compelling games on
besides the one I had to watch. Auburn, a 3 TD favorite over Texas A&M,
somehow found themselves DOWN 3 scores late in the 3rd quarter. Yes, they came back, but the Tiger, in the
last three minutes of the game where they could have scored and either tied and
gone ahead, fumbled not once…But TWICE.
The latter being a total mind meltdown by the center and QB. Ball is snapped early, bounces of QB’s legs,
and back through the center’s legs to the nose tackle for A&M….Can anyone
say, Slappy Fan Grief, here comes Auburn?
The other
game that was on at the same time was the domer-
ASU game. Gholson at one point in
time had more points for ASU via pick-6’s and a horrible fumble that ASU
converted for 6 than the entire ASU offense had scored. ASU didn’t even need an offense…Just wait for
Everett to do something dumb.
Then you had
the Bama-LSU debacle where another
late fumble by Bama looked like it was going to seal Satan’s Warriors
fate. The fumble was recovered and LSU
kicked what appeared to be the game-winning Figgie with a minute and change on
the clock. BUT THEN the ensuing Kick-off
goes Out of Bounds and Bama gets a really short field. Sims drives them down and Bama has to kick
(not always an automatic with Bama) and they tie the game. Bama scores in OT and LSU, instead of pounding the ball like they had been doing all
night, decides to try and pass….not once, or twice…not even three times. LSU passes on ALL FOUR downs in the OT and
loses!!! The Hatter wasn’t thinking
clearly here…..
Utah and Oregon – If I was a coach and a kid I was
coaching EVER DID THIS…I would so completely lose it that I think I
would have to literally throw Utah Wide Receiver Clay off the team because if I
didn’t…I’m afraid I’d kill him. Utes
about to go up 14-0 on Oregon. Long
pass, TD for UTAH!!! But Clay drops the
ball before crossing the plane!!! Oregon
scoops it up and returns it 99 yards for a TD.
That’s a 14
point swing, folks. And Kyle Whittingham
handled it WAY BETTER than I would have….
And it seems
like there was another game going on Saturday…Oh Yeah, right up the road in
East Lansing the two “States that I Hate” were playing a
little football game as well. I Tweeted
and Facebooked a picture out on Saturday and it seems a lot of the fans of
those two schools don’t like my “multi-purpose shirt” I like to pull out on
these special occasions.
Somebody I hate is gonna’ lose….
So, was Sparty over-rated or are the suckeyes just that much better? I think it’s a little of both. Motivation on Urban Legend’s side after
having to endure 11 months of living with the Indianapolis loss and thinking
about this game. Barret is the real deal
and Miller is NOT going to have a starting job come next season, or he wouldn’t
if I’m Urban Legend. Miller should
really think about the NFL or transferring…That’s what the MMQ thinks…But,
Sparty, if it’s any consolation, you can say that you’ve held Michigan in the 4
games under Hoke to less points than OSU hung on you on Saturday. So, you’ve still got that going for you…which
is nice.
Based on all
that, I’m really not sure the B1G gets a team into the Final 4 at this point…which,
what a great segue to
The 5 Stages of
Slappy Fan Grief
- Denial and Isolation: Any team’s fan base that had a team that
royally screwed the pooch on Saturday.
I’ve gotta believe there’s a lot of domers, Tigers – LSU and
Auburn, Utes, Spartans and perhaps Wildcats here…meaning K-State. Everyone wants to believe they still
have a shot with two losses…but nope.
With two losses, welcome to Flea-Bag City.
- ANGER: MICHIGAN FAN….Still here…AIN’T LEAVING!!!! I was angry Saturday when Michigan
couldn’t move the ball against a defense that was nearly as inept as
Indiana’s. Come on…What DOES
MICHIGAN DO ALL WEEK? I’m sure
there’s angry Tigers, domers, Spartys and Utes down here as well. But Michigan owns this category until
the disease is removed from the body of the patient.
- Bargaining: Everyone with one loss that isn’t in the Final
4. In mine, that would be Alabama
and TCU. Win out…maybe. Lose…C Ya’
- Depression: Everyone that’s sitting with three
losses or more wondering where their team is heading for the holidays….
- Acceptance: Everyone sitting at 5 wins figuring out whether or not their team can win
The MMQ’s Top 10
The dominoes
are beginning to fall….and they’re falling hard. My 4th and last team in is Baylor –
most impressive performance and they’ve earned it on the field.
- Miss State – but the Egg Bowl and every
other game on the Bulldogs schedule just got harder…
- FSU- Can they win out? If they don’t…Are they the best 1 loss
team?
- Oregon – Mariota for Heismann…Just
cause…
- Baylor – They are the
best one loss team with the best performance Saturday, destroying Oklahoma!
- Alabama – Not convinced they can win out…If they do,
they’re in. Relax Bama Fan….
- Arizona State…Watch out for this sleeper!!!
- TCU – Not seeing how they get in….just not seeing
it.
- Ole Miss – Best 2 loss team out there.
- Auburn – Wanted to rank lower….
- Ohio – Really don’t see how as a 1-loss team from the B1G can make Final 4…lost to Va-Tech hurts…bad
Idle Thoughts From Saturday
-Big Day of
College Football!
-Game Day in
East Lansing okay….
-Not SEC
equivalent…
-Even Ann
Arbor better than this…
-But the “Hate
Michigan” signs are everywhere…
-Sparty needs
to focus on the task at hand.
-Corso likes
you…Somewhat surprising.
-Favorite
Shirt Day!
-Forgive me…I’m
a Michigan Fan.
-It’s all I’ve
got now….You know…Hating.
-Wow…Is Oklahoma
going to even try?
-Bob Stoops
could be Florida’s head coach…
-Or Michigan’s…
-I just don’t
see that happening.
-But I’d take
him in a heartbeat.
-Michigan’s
offense is…offensive.
-What are we
doing?
-Look at that
domer ASU score – “click”
-Classic
Gholson
-Domer fans
incredibly happy when he’s gone, I’ll bet
-Auburn
getting CRUSHED!
-I like Kevin
Sumlin
-He’s a good
coach
-And I think
he connects well with the players.
-Okay –
Michigan goes ahead…but too much time on the clock.
-Terrible
text from Brother in Law…
-Lots of
F-words, but with different superlativity added.
-I know that’s
not a word…
-Sue me
-Northwestern
scores….Extra point for OT?
-Nope…They’re
going for 2.
-I would too….Why
not?
-Michigan
stuffs it!
-So, should I
be happy or sad here?
-I guess that’s
the best possible outcome. Win, but
sucky…keep heat on Hoke.
-Another game
with less than 500 yards of total offense
- combined!
-So many
games!
-What is LSU
doing now?
-Bama
Fumbles!
-How on earth
do you kick that out of bounds?
-Sparty
getting hit hard…
-Running,
passing.
-Barrett for
real!
-Connor Cook
trying, but not enough.
-Sparty not
playing nearly as hard as they played against Michigan
-Weekly focus…just
not there.
-Beginning of
the end for Sparty?
-Michigan
gets a shot at ohio…
-Not sure
they want it, but they get it.
-UTAH!!! What are you doing?
-OMG…I would
have to keep myself from hitting that kid when he got back to the sidelines…
-Seriously.
-There aren’t
enough laps or anything that I could make that kid do.
-He would
need to transfer.
-And the
Ducks do what the Ducks do.
The Hot Seat
Zoe Saldana
won easily putting her into the HSM Finals which are literally right around the
Holiday Corner. And oh…BTW…Having to
drive my daughters around to various events this weekend, I really have a
simple request:
That’s just a
PSA from the MMQ for anyone else that wishes we could just let the Holiday
Season be the Holiday Season. Anyway,
the Hot Seat Mascot for Week #11:
Barbara Palvin!!!
Hot Seat Rank
Brady
Hoke – It’s a foregone conclusion…
- Beckman: He’s
got problems….
- Hazell: Purdue
beat Illinois….
- Will Muschamp:
Hey – he finally wins the Cocktail Party…he moves down…
- Norm Chow:
Hawaii.
- Mike London:
Needs wins…
FMQ
Well, the FMQ
has had better weeks…I just hate the ties. And the house won another game THIS
WEEK!!! Unbelievable!!!
All I can say
is, we need a big run in the remaining regular season and the conference
championships to even have a shot at finishing in the Black…It’s funny because
I actually looked at taking the Texas A&M Money line ($1,900) on a whim….that
would have been nice.
Baylor
@ Oklahoma (-4.5): Take Baylor
and 4.5 for $40
WIN!!! Bank $76
KSU
(+6) @ TCU: Take TCU
and lay the 6 for $30
WIN!!! Bank $57
Bama @
LSU (+6.5): Take LSU and the 6.5 for $40
Lose….
Oregon
@ Utah (+8): Take the Utes and the 8 for
$30
Lose….What
was I thinking?
Ohio @
SPARTY (-3.5): Take Sparty
and lay the 3.5 for $30
Speaking
of thinking…LOSE…..
Michigan
@ Northwestern (+1): Take Michigan and
lay the 1 for $30
TIE….Lose……
Starting Bank: $373
Total Win: $133
Bank: $506
BONUS
SECTION!
I will try to
post the FMQ on Wednesday as my wife and I will be taking a long weekend down
in Siesta Key Florida starting Thursday!
As luck would have it, we’ll be there for the Sand Castle
Championships! We’ll get lots of photos,
but here’s some from Last year’s competition!
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