Monday, October 22, 2012

A Love Letter To Sparty – Thanks for 900! And Letting Us Put You BACK In Your Place…


I am the MMQ and I approve this message…..

4 Years of PAIN and PRIDE Swallowing and having to endure something I’ve never endured as a football fan, has resulted in today’s:

 Arrogant Ass Summation for the Sparty Lovers that HATE this Blog!

(WARNING: I don’t know if it’s the election year diatribe and the hate ads on TV or what, but I’m not pulling any punches this year. Only read on if you are prepared for a CLASSIC MMQ put down on the earthiest of levels. We’re talking MAJOR throwback here to the early days of what motivated me to start writing this stuff on Mondays…. No vulgar language, mind you, but there is a definite trace of something more sinister and evil going on in the MMQ’s psyche today! I don’t always know where stuff like this comes from, but it’s buried deep inside me just WAITING to get out through my fingers and into the keyboard….)

Let’s make one thing perfectly clear: This is not a rivalry. The University of Michigan does not view Sparty in the same light or as an equal program to OSU and Notre Dame. There is no capacity for hate when the someone in the discussion is someone you view as an inferior in every way, shape and form. The Little Brother has been put back in his place.

This is EXACTLY what SHOULD happen to an inferior opponent that the State of Michigan allows to co-exist. The Michigan Wolverines over the years MADE you the football team and the program that you are today. Without Michigan, you are nothing. Nada. Zilch. Yet you seem to hate us more when you beat us then when you lose. Even though beating us is what puts you on the map. When you lose, you just kind of clam up. In that spirit, the spirit of the ugly word HATE that I normally reserve for the Domers and Suckeyes, well, here comes the Hate:

Right back at ya’!

First – The Kindergarten Level Stuff: Were it not for Sparty Land, where would all the in state high school C-students attend school? Were it not for your football program, what FBS fleabag would Michigan put on its schedule to take your place? Where would we get all of our best Service Sector employees at McD's, Burger King, Olive Garden and the like??

Graduate Level: Sparty, here’s the part where I REALLY twist the knife and begin to pick and probe at your fragile mental state that you’re mired in the middle of this AM: Michigan Fans all know how BADLY you want to be the better football program. How deep in your souls where you live, breathe, and keep your most secret of secrets that YOU don’t want to talk about: WE know how much you would trade one of those Final Four Apperances or an NCAA Basketball Championship for a BCS APPEARANCE or a BCS National Championship. All Michigan Fans are fully aware of HOW YOU HAVE NEVER, EVER MADE A BCS GAME in the 15 years that the BCS has been in existence.

EVER.

Sparty, can you explain that? Can you explain, please, how last season even though you BEAT your HATED RIVAL, these same Michigan Wolverines and you PLAYED in the B1G Championship Game, can you tell me why, WHY the College Football World DID NOT WANT your sorry asses in a BCS matchup and preferred the Mighty Michigan Wolverines to play in the Sugar Bowl? A Bowl, by the way, where Sparty has never played? Much like the Orange Bowl? And the Fiesta? All venues that Michigan has played in and won? Sparty Fans can only hope to see one of those venues before they die…A Bucket list for Sparty Fan of sorts…Could it be because the rest of College Football Nation sees you for exactly what you are? A supporting cast of losers that can never quite seal the deal?

Michigan Fans all know how you want to be THE FOOTABLL TEAM in the State of Michigan and would like nothing better than for The University of Michigan, and especially its fans, to just go away and curl up in a corner and die…But that, my Sparty friends, will never, ever happen.

The Guardians of Tradition and the knowledgeable fans of the Sport of FOOTBALL in this state, the ones that wear the Maize and Blue on Saturday and know what it takes to be Champions will NEVER EVER LET THAT HAPPEN! Michigan Fans know how to endure and, more importantly, maintain a loyalty to their program and their team and the sport of Football even when it doesn’t make sense.

Those Who Stay Will Be Champions.

Those are more than just words. They are a way of life. A mantra of excellence. A belief to never give up and to keep moving forward with a purpose.

Sparty simply knows how to demean, belittle and say, “Well, look on the bright side: Basketball practice has started.”

Alas, Sparty, all you have left for your 2012 football season is a broken dream. A broken dream and a broken team, courtesy of YOUR most hated rival. You may begin drinking now. OR rather, just keep drinking and don’t stop till January 1st, after Michigan plays in yet another bowl... And frankly, after everything I’ve heard for the last 4 years from smug Sparty fans that know no bounds to their hubris, at last, FINALLY, I can honestly say that this victory makes me EXTREMELY happy and very satisfied. Happy for the victory and satisfied with the knowledge that we’ve ruined your season.

So: Keep yer yaps shut till next year….Like usual! The way it should be….and more importantly, the way it’s meant to be.

All is right with the world.

By the way, the MMQ penned a blog about 5 years ago asking this question: Were there any Sparty Fans out there that wanted to take a bet that the Michigan Basketball Team would make a Final Four before Sparty made a BCS game? I got no takers then and I’m sure I won’t get any now. And I believe this coming Basketball season is going to reveal yet another seismic shift in the balance of the Basketball landscape of this state.

So, the bet is still on the table for anyone that wants it. Terms are negotiable. Contact the MMQ at your earliest convenience once you’re done feeling miserable and sorry for yourself. (To the uneducated, this is referred to as baiting someone into making a bad wager.)

Sparty Fan…What do you do now? What dream is left?

Want to talk Hockey? Don’t….

Women’s Volleyball?

Hee-hee…hahahahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!

BCS Mess

Don’t look now, but the BCS has taken a weird turn it what will only be weird turns for the last 5 weeks of the regular season. I believe there will be several BCS preliminaries, including the one this Saturday between the Domers and Laters…If you have been paying attention, and I think its WAY TOO EARLY to even be discussing this, but there is some debate about an undefeated Domer team not making the National Title Game. No kidding. Your MMQ has pointed that out SEVERAL times in the past and now it seems the Domer faithful are beginning to realize it. A 1 loss SEC or PAC12 team is simply going to have a stronger computer ranking over a 12 win Domer team. In a weird kind of way, I’m actually rooting for the Domers and hoping they win all of them and then get “Auburned” and not make the BCS National Championship…Wouldn’t that be sweet? Oh…The whining we would hear from South Bend with that scenario!!!

1. Satan’s Warriors: No surprise here. Until they are beat, they’re in the Championship.
2. GATORLAND: This can’t last as someone in the SEC will lose…
3. K-State: Some are surprised by this rank, but when you beat the Laters in Norman, well, Computers like that. And Shellacking WVU didn’t hurt…
4. DUCKS: Need more quality wins and they have to hope that the rest of their competition wins out…
5. DOMERS: This SHOULD get fixed this weekend in Norman and we never have to put these guys in a BCS top 5 again…
6. LSU: In a great position as the first 1 loss team
7. Oregon State: Needs LOTS OF HELP
8. Oklahoma: Ditto
9. USC…Not THAT one…The one of the WEST Coast….
10. Georgia: Just in case they win out, the pollsters want to keep these guys up there…

The Rest of the Mess

Domers (JEEZ I HATE THESE GUYS!) vs. BYU: So…Two TD favorites against BYU and they squeak one out again. Domers have a defense, but they’re offense is going to need to show up one of these days. My guess is that one of them lets the Domer Faithful down on Saturday….

GATORLAND vs. The Old Ball Coach: Steve’s alma mater really stuck it to him good on Saturday. The Gamecocks didn’t know which way their jock straps went on…

K-STATE vs. WVU: Time to find another Heismann leading candidate. Geno Smith losing two blowouts just took himself out of contention. Look out for a defensive candidate on an undefeated team to make some noise in the coming weeks….

CornSUCKERs vs. Kitty Kats: I knew Bo would find a way to win that game…They lose, and they’re out of the B1G title race. But sorry Bo, there’s a team coming from Ann Arbor that may have a thing or two to say about you B1G Championship run…
Idle Thoughts From Saturday

-What a perfect day for Football…
-Some days are better than others.
-I think I finally dried out after the Illinois game..
-And we’re still waiting for the final say on the Illini mascot and tribe thing from Yost over at M-Zone..
-Tailgate was awesome! It was like the BAND WAS BACK TOGETHER!
-MMQ’s brother wore a multi-purpose/multi-game shirt for the occasion.


-What do a Sparty and Michigan student have in common?
-They both APPLIED to Michigan!
-Pre-Game Tiddies from Gary Parsons!


-Excellent call…A little Tiddy’s pregame is an incredible thing!
-Not that “BIG GAME!” will ever be replaced….
-And it is a Big GAME!
-Kovacs!!!!! NICE INT!!!
-Can we PLEASE convert a 3rd down?
-Why has Sparty been able to do so well at stopping DeRob?
-At least our Defense showed up.
-That group has improved tremendously.
-I’ll take field goals, but TD’s are nicer…obviously…
-Oh man, this is it.…30 or more yards to get in range…And DeRob hasn’t thrown one that far all day..
-DILEO! Nice Catch!
-Gibbons…PLEASE BE THINKING OF BRUNETTES!

-IT’S GOOOOOOOD!!!!!!!!

-WAHOOOOO!
-I think that feeling in that stadium was one of sweet relief across the board.
-It wasn’t like the Domers under the lights game…
-This was more like, “Finally. Beat Little Brother. The way it should be…”
-900 WINS! How sweet is that?

-I hope I make it to see 1,000….
-We figured 10-12 years…so it’s doable…
-What are the chances it can be Sparty again?
-Hee-hee…..HAHAHAHAHAHA! He who laughs last….

More Idle Thoughts From the Weekend….

-St. Louis and San Fran are going 7 games…
-That’s what we wanted as Tiger Fans…
-Tigers Scrimmaged each other on Sunday…
-I would have bought a ticket to THAT…
-Just to have some fun!


The Hot Seat

I am ALWAYS impressed with the Reader Suggestions for Mascots. I must say that there are a lot of readers out there with too much time on their hands that like looking at eye candy on the internet! But, that’s not to say I don’t appreciate them! I really do! I want to give the readers what they’re looking for and here is another suggestion for Hot Seat Weekly nominee for Week #8: Lacey Chabert! You may remember Lacey ( I know I did) from the movie “Mean Girls” that she was in with Lindsay Lohan. I’m apparently still a big fan!

 

 


Not too many changes, but there is one GONE Coach from Idaho: Akey He’ll go on the gone list soon to be followed by many, but not necessarily all of the following:

1. John L Smith – He’s only on a 10 month contract, but it wouldn’t surprise me if they canned him before then…To hire….WHO?
2. Gene Chizik: Losing to the Hawgs AND MSU in the same year gets you on the list…National Championships be damned! Question is: Who does Aburn, actually, anyone get if they fire the guys on this list? Petrino?
3. Derek Dooley: Needs a MAJOR win in the SEC
4. Mack Brown: I know, I know. But you didn’t think they would fire Joe Pa, either. Believe the MMQ when I say that his retirement or canning is nearer than you think…
5. Frank Spaziani: BC is a proud school that doesn’t get a lot of attention…. Until you lose to ARMY….And get a new AD looking to make a name for himself.
6. The Old Ball Coahc: Can’t lose to your Alma Mater by double digits and not feel some heat..
6. (Tie) Paul Johnson. GT’s season has been an up and down roller coaster and losing to Middle Tennessee State should have had him on the list earlier…But he’s here now.
7. Pasqualoni – UCONN This team has not gotten better and only gotten a LOT worse since their Fiesta Bowl appearance two years ago…
8. Randy Edsall: Maryland is going to start thinking that with the ACC as screwed up as it is, why aren’t we winning more football games?
9. .Bo Pelini. Can’t lose to UCLA and start the B1G 1-1 and not expect to suffer a little…Kevin Wilson: But can Indiana really expect much more? Really?
10. Dabo Sweeney: Either find a defense or find a new job…
11. Joker Phillips: Because someone at Kentucky cares….
12. Brett Beilema – Wiscy. His fans have expectations now. Can’t lose to the Cornsuckers whenyou’re up 27-10.
13. Tedford: Only Hot Seat Coach to lose in Week 1!! But I can’t move him above Kelly.
14. Mark Richt: Just because he will lose some game he’s not supposed to and the annual “Fire Mark Richt” bandwagon will get a spit polish and a coat of paint…

GONE:
1.  Avey - Idaho:  1-7 will do that to a guy...


The FMQ

Well, with the EXCEPTION of Sparty NOT cooperating and going down by more than the spread, it was another good week for the FMQ. A few more like this one and we can get back into the black for 2012. And there are SEVERAL Picks I like this week!
Cornsuckers (+4) @ NWU: Never a doubt!
Take the Huskers and the 4 for $50: WIN Bank $95

BYU (+14) @ Domers: Never a doubt #2!
Take BYU and the 14 for $25: WIN Bank $47.50

Sooners (-34.5) vs. Kansas: Never a Doubt #3!!!
Take the Sooners and lay the 34.5 for $30. WIN Bank: $57

MICHIGAN (-9.5) vs. MSU:
Take Michigan and lay the 10 for $45: Should have doubted this a little…LOSE
Take the UNDER for $30: NEVER A Doubt #4: Bank $57

PARLAY! (6 to 1)

Huskers – Sooners – Michigan for $10 – Damn Sparty….Lose

BANK:                $576
TOTAL Win:      $256.50
BANK:                $832.50

This Week’s Early Odds:

Ducks (-45) at Colorado: Ducks will roll the Buffs…But can they cover?

Sparty at Wiscy (-6.5): Sparty has ALWAYS had a hard time playing there and SOS is back in the HOUSE! Let’s just lock this on in at 6.5 and go with the Badgers!

OSU at PSU (-2.5): Is Braxton in or out?

Michigan (+2.5) @ CORNSUCKERS: I think Michigan is on a roll…This would almost put B1G Legends out of reach…

Domers (+9.5) @ Laters: Man…I was hoping for like 7 here, but I think I still need to take the Laters and lay the 9.5.

1 comment:

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