Monday, October 3, 2016

Melted Cheese is Fondue, Right?

Pre-Game Tailgate Feeling:

Damn it feels good to be an (Arrogant) Ass Again!!!


Was it a game for the ages?  In reality, it was kind of a 15 round prize fight slug fest penalty ridden mess that didn’t have a lot of huge plays, kind of had a lot of offense (but not a lot of scoring for Michigan – but they knocked on the door a bunch of times) and there was plenty of yelling in the 4th quarter and a few tense moments.  Oh, and before I get too far ahead of myself, as you all know I sometimes do, there was this Wiscy – Tango- Foxtrot High-School formation moment:


In the 2nd half we had Stribling who was stellar and I think he was tied for 3rd leading receiver for Wiscy with 2 catches – Er, wait – check that - Interceptions! 

In fact, Michigan saved the best for last with this beauty.  In the 4th quarter, tie game, ON FIRST DOWN no less, with Bo rolling over in his grave, Jimmy let Speight air it out to Darboh – and they connected!!!!



I think we all had the feeling after that catch that it was kind of over.  It was going to take a miracle on Wiscy’s part to close the gap as they continued to start with a field of 80 plus yards in a very loud north End Zone state of confusion.  Then, Jordan Lewis did something kind of “Woodson-esque” – albeit a knockdown would have given Michigan the ball inside the 10 yard line, something the Ole MMQ didn’t even put together until I was back at the tailgate!



It was just an incredible play that will make a lot of season ending highlight reels and has let people know that Jourdan Lewis lives!

I know, I know.  It wasn’t the margin of victory predicted by the FMQ, but if Kenny Allen could put the BALL THROUGH THE UPRIGHTS I believe there would have been at least two if not three scores of separation in Saturday’s game.

Worst Feeling in the world was when Newsome went down late and I think the entire team came out on the field.  Michigan cannot afford an offensive line injury and it looks like the worst has happened….Next man up…

Was it the test we’ve been waiting for?

I’ll say….Yes.  After re-watching the game on BTN60, Wiscy Football 2016 is, as always, a legitimate Top 10 team and can probably claw their way back into the Top 10 in the coming weeks with a few victories against other Top 25 teams (Nebraska, suckeyes). I know that the Wiscy offense was anemic or non-existent, but I’m chalking that up to Michigan’s Defense rising to the occasion and taking things away.  The pass happy attack that beat Sparty wasn’t available to Wiscy in Ann Arbor.  But they will be back on offense against other teams. 

Bring on Rutgers!

The Rest of the Mess

Cinci Chilli @ Houston (Thursday):  This game was kind of over before it ever got started.  Yes, it was an interesting first half of the 1st quarter, and then Houston more or less said, “Why are we toying with these clowns”?  The throttle went down and Herman and Houston added another style point victory to their resume.

HUSKIES vs. Stanford (Friday):  Wow.  I mean just….WOW.  I was sort of, kind of watching this game while I worked on a project on Friday evening in the work room (more on that in Idle Thoughts).  It was weird because I could hear the announcers saying that Washington scores again!  Beating Stanford 44-6 gets my attention.   The defense of the Huskies is for real and their offense is nothing to sneeze at, either.  The Huskies go to a 2-3 Oregon Quack-less Attack on Saturday (as 8 point favorites) and are the Pac North Leaders for the moment.  The Chris Peterson Era in the Pac has begun….

Syracuse @ Domers (in the Meadowlands):  Domers claim this is a 2nd home.  I guess they made their point with a drubbing of the Orange in the Meadowlands.  But Kelly’s seat is still hot as the Domers have nothing left to play for this season but a non-New Year’s day bowl….

SOS @ Indiana:  SOS – SOS – SOS – SOS – SOS – SOS – SOS – SOS – SOS

Sending out an SOS for “Same-Ole-Sparty”.  Got a chance to see a lot of this one on the couch on Saturday night with Superfan.  Indiana is not bad and Sparty is not good.  When you get to OT and you get the ball first, the idea is you have to score, period.  That’s your job.   A TD or a Figgie.  One or the other.  When you do ‘nuther, well, you’re not going to win very many games.  After a total Sparty-Fail in the first OT, the Hosers put a butt-hurt on Sparty with the 2nd field goal attempt after Sparty shot themselves in the foot - AGAIN by leaping off a player to try and block the first kick.  The penalty brought the Hosers closer, and the kicker straightened out the 2nd kick and it was over.   Marcus (Not in East Lansing much longer if LSU calls) Pannini might be heading out of Dodge on the first train to Baton Rouge now that his seat is warm and he’s sitting at 2-2 in the first week of October and 0-2 in the B1G (first time since 2007).  When does Hoops season start?

Tennessee @ Georgia:  Kirby’s seat just got extra warm, except that there’s no way a team that “suffered” 15 years with Mark Richt will fire Kirby before season 3 or 4.  Georgia had just scored with less than 10 seconds on the clock on a long TD of their own to take the lead right before this happened: 

 The Cremesicles throw the Hail Mary from the 50 yard line with 4 tics on the game clock and manage to haul it in to claim the victory, yeah, things are going to be difficult the next week.  Welcome to Head Coaching in the SEC, Kirby….

Eddie O’s Tigers vs. Missouri:  Hey, look at that!  Ogeron takes over and the Tigers find a way to score more than 20 points!  Here’s the issue with firing Les Miles mid-season.  Ogeron’s going to win some games.  He’s won the first one in convincing fashion to a team that some thought might beat LSU.  If ole Ed keeps winning and goes 7-1 or 8-0 and makes it to the SEC Championship, the question becomes:  How do you fire him NOW?????  This is going to be a fun situation to watch for the rest of the season

Huskers vs. Illini:  Huskers did their job and Smiling Mike Riley is still smiling!

Maryland vs. Purdon’t:  50 points Purdon’t?  50 POINTS????  What the hell are you doing Hazell?  I can tell you right now you’re moving up the Hot Seat in a fast and furious way!

Furry rodents vs. PSU:  I was a little disappointed in the furry rodents Saturday, to say the least.  The Big Blue “M” handed “little m” the “BLUE” Print for beating the Nittany Nuthins and you squandered it away like a drunken sailor in Bangkok…which, I think you did as you dick-tripped down the field time and time again letting opportunity after opportunity slip away.  Sure, you got it to OT, but that was not necessary.  And this happened: 


Bad form, gophers, bad form….Targeting is targeting as we all know!  It’s such a simple rule!!

Clemson vs. Louisville:  Clemson holds home-field advantage, but Louisville looked strong none the less.  The ACC’s is Clemson’s to lose at this point and I really don’t think FSU is going to have a lot to say about it….Speaking of the Seminoles:

TarHEELS vs. Florida State:  Jimbo Fisher is also taking calls and sending his resume out after losing to the Tarheels in semi-dramatic fashion.  Injuries suck, but at the same time, that FSU defense isn’t playing the same as it did a couple of years ago.  FSU could easily lose two more games (Canes and Gatorland still on the schedule) and have now entered into the 5 Stages of Slappy Fan Grief in a Big Way!

The 5 Stages of Slappy Fan Grief

  1. Denial and Isolation Seminoles.  Okay, we have two losses in the ACC, but at the beginning of the season everyone was talking about 2 ACC Teams in the CFP…So we just need to win out, right?  Georgia fans also fall into the D&I category this week with the comments of “Smart gets a pass for the first season.  I don’t care what he finishes….”  Throw ole Sparty Fan in here as they’re going to say that “It’s only 1-loss in the B1G East and we still control our destiny!!!”
  2. ANGER –The Domers haven’t left.  Still pissed off and moaning about Kelly. Sparty has arrived.  Fans are pissed that they’re 2-2 and their coach is in every rumor mill for anyone that’s looking for a coach.  LSU, Domers and USC are all places that Dantonio could end up.  Going to put a few Seminoles down here as their heads are spinning and they can’t believe they just lost to the Tarheels.    
  3. Bargaining –Quack Attack.  Fire Helfrich and go get Kelly Back.  2-3 at that place hasn’t been seen in I don’t know how many years.  You can bet Phil Knight is already making phone calls and trying to figure out how much he’ll have to pay to get Kelly to come back to right the ship…. 
  4. Depression – Cardinal Fans…Stanford had been the measuring stick in the Pac 12 for a lot of years.  After the Beat Down at the hands of Washington, the Cardinal have been shown what Chris Peterson football looks like.  And it’s a better version of what Stanford used to do! 
  5. Acceptance – Purdue. How in the Blankety-Blank world do you lose to Maryland by 50 POINTS?????  That’s not possible.  Maryland’s good, but they are NOT 50 points better than Purdue….. Have I mentioned I’m glad Maryland is home this season?  That’s shaping up to be a Big Game….

Idle Thoughts from Saturday

-For what was supposed to be a rainy day, it’s beautiful!

-Glad I brought the sunglasses!

-Kudos to E-Kitten for the new tent! 

-I didn’t get a photo – next home game. 

-And the Mystery of Big Game is revealed!  (It doesn’t Self Regenerate!!)

-E-Kit has the steadiest hands…

-For people who’ve been to the tailgate, you know we try to be somewhat organized.

-Were not Candelabras and Tiffany lamps like Victors, but we are efficient, dammit!

-Except for the “Blue Tub”. 

-Apologies to whoever it was that came LAST week against PSU and we couldn’t locate you a beer coozie.

-You know, those little foam rubber things you have a million of at home but not in the tailgate supply tub where it’s really needed.

-So, I got home last Sunday, got some coozies and put them in the tub. 

-And saw disorganization. 

-And it made me mad.  And it motivated me with an enthusiasm unknown to mankind!

-And “The Tub Caddy” happened.   We’re fengshui-ing it for this season and will finalize a design after.

- Feng Shui is a Chinese philosophical system of harmonizing everyone and everything with the surrounding environment.

-And I just like saying that word. 

-The Enthusiasm didn’t end as I was sitting in a long and lousy meeting Friday afternoon and this materialized in my head.

-AP (Can-Game multi-season Champion) has wanted a “Can Game Trophy” for years!

-And I finally figured one out. 

-And it was a fun Friday Night Project….

-So there’s that.

-Superfan is alive and well!  Happy to have you at the Tailgate!

-JB made the board!  Just making to Board in the Can Game is a Big Deal, trust me.

-Some days you never feel like you’re going to get there!

-Hey!  The Drum Major did it!  No hands, stick – NOTHIN’!!!

-I guess she must read the Ole MMQ! 

-Didn’t want to be dissed anymore….

-SKY Divers!

-The first guy hit the target!  GO BLUE!

-I think I like the Skydivers better than the flyovers. 

-Knowing there’s a guy RIGHT THERE that’s about to land on the M is cool….

-Let’s go! 

-Kenny, I’d really like it if you could KICK IT THROUGH THE UPRIGHTS!

-Sheesh…IT’s a simple game. You throw the ball, you catch the ball.

-And you kick the ball.  Straight.

-Oh, no.  Newsome down.  I think the entire team is on the field…

-This can’t be good…



-and then the RAIN CAME!

-Accident post game right in front of the tailgate


-Can’t happen.  Never has, never will.

-Which is why you post game tailgate, also. 

-Sunday Thoughts:

-Perusing the Top 25 and Sparty is 404…..Nowhere to be found!

-What was the last season where Michigan and Washington were in the Top 10 at the same time?  I know it’s happened ‘cause we played them in the Rose Bowl in 1991.


The Hot Seat

Week #5’s Hot Seat Mascot.  This week’s Hot Seat Mascot is ring girl Meisha Tate!!!!


We’ll keep track of who’s gone as the season progresses….

  1. Miles and Cameron – LSU Head Coach and Offensive Coordinator. 
  2. VanGorder – Domer D-Coordinator. 
  3. Ron Turner – FIU. 

Electric Chair of Death Seat!

  1. Kelly – Domers (2-3).  Why he might get fired:  Do you see this season’s record?  He’ll get off the Electric Chair when he’s 0.500.   Why he Won’t Get Fired:  $warbuck$ and the MONEY, MONEY, MONEY!!!!  And who would you get?  What pipe dream are you going to chase? 
  2. Charlie Strong – Texas.  Two losses in a row to Big Offense – no Defense teams (Cal and Okie State) where Texas not only can’t hang, but they’re not even slowing anyone down.  Strong demoted D-Coordinator Bedford.  I think the writing is on the wall at Texas, but they’ll wait till the end of the season before making the move….

The Hot Seat – Guy’s that have Hot Seats but Won’t get Canned, Immediately

  1. Hazell  - Purdon’t.  Been there too long and giving up 50 to Maryland is not good…
  2. Helfrich – Oregon (2-3).  Okay – its getting ugly and I’m not saying that SanFran will fire Kelly after 1 season, but I am saying that SanFran seems to be a place where great college coaches go before they return to the College Game.  And the Wallet of Knight (NIKE) is never empty and has NO BOTTOM!
  3. Whoever’s coaching USC – Helton.  Down one notch after a win....
  4. Muschamp  - Just cause….
  5. Kirby Smart – Two really bad losses in a row...
  6. Dave Doeren – NC State. 
  7. Franklin – PSU.   A Little cooler with OT Win over Gophers.
  8. Adazzio  - Boston College. 
  9. Malzhan – Auburn. 

Short List of Available or Desirable Head Coaches

  1. Jimbo Fisher – now sitting with 2 ACC losses, is probably taking phone calls from anyone that’s looking….
  2. Kiffin – Still here and worth the risk
  3. Hermann –Who’s going to get him?
  4. PJ Fleck – Western Michigan is undefeated!  Row the Boat!
  5. Willie Taggart  - USF
  6. John Bonamego – Central Michigan
  7. Les Miles AVAILABLE FOR HIRE!!!!

Side NFL NOTE:  The Lions are inept.  Caldwell isn’t the guy.  Why hasn’t Mr. New England already canned him?  Does his contract end this season?

Golf Side Note:  If you weren’t flipping back and forth between the Lions and the Ryder Cup, you really missed some great golf.  USA-USA-USA!

Detroit Tigers Note:  In case you hadn’t heard, it’s over.  Meaning Summer is over.  When your baseball team is done, it’s always kind of a sad day….

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