Monday, September 17, 2012

Ho Hum….UMass Offers Little As To What This Team IS

No need for healing pictures…But UMass’ team bloggers may want to steal a page from the M-Zone and try it. I don’t know what, if anything, you take away from the game if you’re a Minuteman. As expected, the Amaizin’ Blue treated UMass kind of like a new born puppy treats a chew toy: Abuse, thrash, shake around, repeat. With a couple of exceptions (D-Rob’s int being one of those) this game was a pretty good indication of what Michigan can look like against inferior opponents.

But, what exactly, if anything, did the fans (or the team for that matter) learn? I know that D-Rob is the fastest guy on the field in a regular game. He was more than likely faster than all of the UMass collective that he was facing. Michigan’s receivers were bigger, stronger and able to get wide open against a rather porous defense. Even the Michigan defense seemed to find a little something and put some stops on the UMass offense.

But at the end of the day with a lot of stats and even more points, what do we really know? This is still the same team that didn’t get a first down against Alabama until the 2nd quarter. Have they improved at all? I don’t know. Which is kind of why I hate playing these games. We learn nothing, risk injury and get a nice ‘W’ on the win-loss column. And yeah, it’s better than an ‘L’. I would not want to be Sparty this week.

Or USC….

Or Va Tech….

But more on them in a minute. This week, as usual, the mettle of Michigan will be tested against a group of players that have a purpose. Not only are they looking at revenge for the last three years, but there is an underlying hatred of what D-Rob and Michigan have done to the Domers (JEEZ I HATE THESE GUYS!) for two of the last three years….Charlie Wuzzles lost his last game in the last seconds….Ditto for Kelly. Kelly still hasn’t won a truly big game.

It’s going to be war.

I hope they’re ready.

Michigan is a road dog getting 7. That part I like.
The Rest of the Mess

Sparty – Domers: For one of the most anticipated games of the day, I have to say that this one was kind of a snoozer. Domers came out in shambles, immediately picked up a 5 yard penalty and then had to burn a time out before 1 second had ticked off the first quarter clock. Not that I minded. As the MMQ’s brother in law likes to say in a game like this: “Somebody I hate is gonna lose…” which isn’t a bad thing. What was bad, in my humble opinion, was that Sparty seemed to want to beat itself (in the bad way) more than the Domers did. Dropped passes, dropped interceptions, stupid penalties and an O-line that couldn’t keep anyone off their new QB, even though the Domers were only rushing 3 guys at times. I hate to think that Lou Holz is right and that the Domers “Are the real deal”, but I have to admit that Sparty made them look good. Sparty, which was the last undefeated hope of the B1G, goes down like a Viagra-less you know what at home….Does Michigan stand a chance?

Purdue-EMU: Purdue is making me nervous this year. I hate it when that happens….

Cremesicles vs. Gatorland: Dooley just moved UP on the Hot Seat List and Muschamp has figured out a way to keep himself off of the list. Game was good till 2nd half when everything went south for Tennessee.

Satan’s Warriors vs. Arkansas: I told you John L might find a way to get himself canned before his interim contract was up. I now have to move him into the top 10 after an embarrassing 52-0 shut-out loss at home. Telling the troops to keep their piss hot may not be enough coaching direction and the PTB at Arkansas may pull the trigger sooner rather than later.

Cheeseheads vs. Utah State: Beliema might have to move up a little on the ‘ole Hot Seat as beating Utah State is expected, but beating them only by a deuce is way unexpected. Cheesehead land is hurting without their O-coordinator who is getting it figured out at Pitt. Speaking of which….

Pitt vs. Va-Tech: WTF. I know, this is a family column, but really. Pitt looked absolutely dismal in their first two outings, one of which I partially watched when they lost to Cinci…And then they come out on Saturday and not only hang 35 on a decent VT defense, but hold a relatively explosive offense to 17? Maybe Berry Alvarez’s answer is to go hire the Pitt Head Coach BACK and let him run the show…

USC vs. Stanford: Okay. I’m done buying any of the hype of USC. They suck. Stanford, on the other hand, looks pretty darn good on the defensive side of the ball. And they may be the one making waves in the Pac 12 this year. The Ducks may have more to fear than just the usual suspects….

Suckeyes vs. Bears: Too bad the Bears couldn’t get a first down late or kick a field goal…Things just might have ended differently in the Shoe. Suckeyes have some blemishes on both offense and defense, but each rose to the occasion in the 4th quarter to seal the victory.
Idle Thoughts From Saturday

-What a gorgeous day for Football!
-I love bright, sunshiny 60 to 70 degree days in the fall with low humidity
-Anyone who doesn’t like that kind of weather?
-If you don't like it, I simply can’t relate to you.
-Why so much about the weather?
-Cause the 3:30 scrimmage I watched didn’t require me to think about too much…
-Okay, it was a game. But not really.
-I did think about next week vs. the Domers (JEEZ I HATE THESE GUYS!)
-And how we may only have a few more years to enjoy that rivalry.
-Can D-Rob and company pull off 4 in a row?
-They have to play the game, which I love!
-2nd hostile environment this year (If you’re counting Dallas as hostile)
-And D-Rob did okay last time down there. (hee-hee).
-I hope the BTN shows nothing but last year’s Under the Lights game this week…
-Domers come out and embarrass themselves…initially. Then, not so much.
-Might be a must win for Kelly. Can’t lose to Sparty and Wolverines again…
-Sparty looks off.
-Remote batteries are getting tired. Why can’t bowl days be like regular Football Saturdays?
-USC - Stanford and MSU-Domers. Two great match—ups.
-Stanford Defense is good. USC does NOT have a running game. Hence, one dimensional and easy to anticipate…
-Did anyone catch the end of the BYU - Utah Game?
-BYU kicker will be mentally scarred for life…Three opportunities with 0 ticks on the clock (to tie the game) and three misses…
-That sucks no matter who you are.
-PSU wins! I was glad to see that.
-Really. Haven’t the innocent all been through enough? Those kids are playing for pride.
-I hope they win a couple of B1G games, too.

The Hot Seat

This week’s Hot Seat Mascot is a nominee that came to my attention in my recent flights acround the globe. There isn’t much to do in economy on an airplane, so you watch a few movies. This actress was in Men In Black III and it made me wonder who she was. It didn’t take much research to conclude that she would be a good candidate. Without further ado: Alice Eve!

The order is a changing….But until Kelly beats Michigan, he stays at the top.

1. Kelly, Brian: Until someone, anyone unseats him or he beats Michigan, he has to be number 1.
2. John L Smith – He’s only on a 10 month contract, but it wouldn’t surprise me if they canned him before then…
3. Derek Dooley: Derek needed a W against Florida. He needed it really bad. I’m not sure he survives another season if the Vols don’t make a bowl.
4. Tedford: Only Hot Seat Coach to lose in Week 1!! But I can’t move him above Kelly.
5. Randy Edsall: Maryland is going to start thinking that with the ACC as screwed up as it is, why aren’t we winning more football games?
6. Kevin Wilson: But can Indiana really expect much more? Really?
7. Brett Beilema – Wiscy. His fans have expectations now. 200 yards of total offense are NOT their expectations.
8. Dabo Sweeney: Either find a defense or find a new job….
9. Mark Richt: Just because he will lose some game he’s not supposed to and the annual “Fire Mark Richt” bandwagon will get a spit polish and a coat of paint…
10. Tubberville: Yeah, he’ll have a defense, but those people at Texas Tech are used to FIREWORKS!!!!!
11. Frank Spaziani: BC is a proud school that doesn’t get a lot of attention…
12. Mack Brown: I know, I know. But you didn’t think they would fire Joe Pa, either. Believe the MMQ when I say that his retirement or canning is nearer than you think…
13. Bo Pelini – Cornsucker fans expect to beat their non-conference opponents.


Jeez…The FMQ is humbled again. I hate it when that happens. Biggest problem that I can see in the self analysis: Too much faith in teams to cover. Too much faith in revenge games. Too much faith in bad teams staying bad. But when there’s upsets, well…That makes me feel even worse because the other side of the bet would have been stress free!

EMU @ Purdue(-24): Take Purdue and lay the 24 for $30
WIN! Danny Hope doesn’t like anything with Michigan in the title. BANK: $57

Domers @ Sparty (-6.5): Take Sparty and lay the 6.5 for $50
Doth mine eyes deceive me? Where did Sparty go and are the Domers that good? LOSE

USC (-10) @ Stanford:
Take USC and lay the 10 for $60
Huh, wah? Stanford 4 in a row over the Mighty Trojans?….LOSE

Va Tech (-12) @ Pitt: Take Va Tech, lay the 12 for $50
I don’t like the trend this is taking. Did you also notice that these last three games weren’t only point spread losses – THEY WERE UPSETS that I was on the wrong side of….
’dis ish wen my hed asploded…..LOSE

UMASS @ Michigan (-45): Take Michigan and lay the 45 for $60
Okay…two wins…But this was a miserable week…BANK: $114

3 Team Parlay pays 6 to 1.
Michigan – MSU - USC for $20

Starting Bank:     $656
Total Win:          $171
Bank:                 $827 (Ugh….I hate going in the hole early….)

Early Monday Picks:

Michigan (+7) @ Domers
LSU (-18.5) @ Auburn
Arizona (+24) @ Oregon
Kansas State (+14) @ Oklahoma

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