Almost. Football Saturday’s
definitely help and I will admit that it’s extremely difficult to pull yourself
off the beach when it’s 88 degrees with a Gulf of Mexico water temp of 81. If I had to make that decision every weekend,
even to leave and go watch it on a tube somewhere…Frankly, I don’t know how I’d
do it.
So, cutting to the chase: The
Michigan analysis will be a little light but never the less: WHERE THE @!#!!$#@%% was some of that offense
LAST WEEK against PSU? I’m starting to
wonder if the Michigan coaches actually troll all the same blogs that I do
(Yeah, this one included) and I wonder if they have figured out that the fans
are paying attention and that when you screw up as a coach, there’s just way
too much visibility out there that can be put on you. I understand that coaches want to “protect”
the kids. Best way to protect them these
days however seems to be letting them play and make plays….especially Gardner. And Gallon sets a B1G record: 369 RECEIVING YARDS? That used to be a 3 game total under
Schembechler folks….and that was with Anthony Carter….
However, all kidding aside, it is always fun to watch football down in
“ESS-EEE-SEE” country. Our first tiki
hut stop (After seeing the “Land Shark!”) was in
 |
| Mail Man....Candy Gram....LAND SHARK! |
Siesta Key Village where we
sat down about noon to see Mizzou take on Gatorland. Of course, there were a couple of Gator Fans
there that immediately commented on my Michigan T-Shirt and said they would
explain this thing called “The Forward Pass” to me whenever Mizzou or Gatorland
attempted one. I simply reminded them of
the Citrus bowl where Tebow went down to the Wolverines and I thought that
there were quite a few “Forward Passes” thrown in that game…And that sort of
shut them up. However, they went on to talk about how the Gator Defense would
chew up this Frosh QB. Then I remembered
that Maty Mauk, a kid Michigan recruited pretty heavily, was going to get the
start. (I never remember recruits, but somehow that kid’s name has stuck with
me…Maybe it’s the poet that doesn’t know it in me that loved the potential
alliteration that existed with the “Maty Mauk of Michigan!” tv/radio call….I
dunno) I made that comment to them as
Mizzou received the ball. You know, just trying to be polite. One of them than said, “Well, that makes me
feel even better about the Gator’s chances!”
Then, Mauk throws on the first play from scrimmage for a long
completion. I just kind of glanced at
the two but I didn’t say anything….Yet.
Then, about 4 plays later, Mauk passed for the opening drive TD. Of course, your Ole MMQ couldn’t stay quiet
very long. “So, how are you feeling
now?” They claimed it was early game
luck and that eventually Mauk would falter…Of course, that didn’t happen and I
was able to outlast the Gator fans as they left their stools to find a more
desolate location to watch in misery.
The next stop found me next to some Georgia fans that were much less
enthusiastic. One saw my shirt and
politely nodded and asked where I was from in Michigan. He was actually from Birmingham and had moved
to Florida about 5 years prior. How he
got to be a Dawg I didn’t ask. But he
was miserable and lamented about how bad the season had gone. I didn’t get a chance to stay to the end of
that one, but I’m sure he wasn’t a happy camper.
And there were a TON of SEC fans in misery over the weekend….Which might
be a great lead in to:
5 Stages of Slappy Fan Grief
- Denial and Isolation –All those
1-Loss or even 2-Loss SEC teams in the East (which, with the exception of
Mizzou) is like, everyone, is still somehow believing that the other guys
are gonna beat the team that they lost to in order for them to get into
the SEC Championship game…only to get pounded by Alabama. The Ole Ball Coach dumps one to “rival”
UT and that has that fan base growling.
So, a lot of them are in the stage below as well. But they are still somehow believing
they have a shot. AT this point,
and maybe I’m living a little “B1G” denial here, but I would happily put
the top 7 B1G teams (ohio, Wiscy, Sparty, NWU, Nebraska, Iowa and
Michigan) up against the SEC East and play a round robin. My guess is the B1G comes out on top
more often than not. Some other
schools with fan bases that are in Denial are Stanford, LSU, and some
Clemson fans who are just plain shocked…
- ANGER - This category literally EXPLODED With
fanbases over the weekend. The
leader in the race to depression/acceptance with a long stay in the Anger
phase has to be Clemson Fans. They
are without question angry at losing to FSU and trying to understand what
happened Saturday night in their own house. Dabo’s seat just got hot again and he’s
gonna need a but cushion filled with ice cubes to cool it down. Losing games like that was SUPPOSED TO
HAVE ENDED after the WVU shellacking that Clemson took in the Orange a few
years back. Dabo vowed never
again…Well, I’m no expert…But that looked a lot like a butt-kicking blow
out of a score. And if I’m a
Clemson Fan, I might be screaming that it’s never going to change until we
get rid of the coaching staff…And I might be right….LSU fans are down in
this category for the simple reason that they controlled their fate and
now they need a lot of help. Believe
it or not, I saw a couple of ohio fans at one of the pubs and they were
extremely pissed that they weren’t KILLING Iowa and that this would hurt
their chances long term for a title shot.
Gator Fan is down here along with South Carolina fan, too. And we can’t forget about that Friday
night score where UCF finishes off any chance Louisville had of a Title
shot. And what a place Siesta Key
was to be on Friday as the town whooped up that win…But Cardinals
everywhere slunked off to rage at the machine….
- Bargaining – There’s also a whole slew of
fans that are now in this stage.
Northwestern fans hit it hard here this weekend for the simple
reason that any chance of a B1G title is no long gone when they were so
close to upsetting the Boss of the B1G.
How quickly fates can change and the Wildcats are just trying to
salvage a New Year’s Day game out of the season…if possible. Add to them some USC Gamecocks and
Trojans after dropping what was an extremely winnable game against the
domers and it’s easy to see why this stage is really filling up and it’s
getting to SRO (Standing Room Only).
Another group that is filling the Bargaining Stage: Texas A&M slappies. Losing to Auburn is not only a nail in
the coffin, but I believe Sumlin will take those USC Pat Haden calls now
along with whatever Texas might be offering. Is that the NFL also calling? Kevin is answering his cell now. I want to believe that Razorback fans
are down here in this mess simply because there cannot be any more anger
in that fan base left….It is Beliema’s first year and while I’m sure he’ll
make a 2nd year, well, it IS the SEC you know….And who would
Arkansas get….Petrino? I’m going to
add a couple of teams down here at the bottom simply because even if they
win out, well, they are still on the outside looking in. Based on the BCS that came out today,
OREGON (which I think has an opportunity to improve their computer
ranking), Baylor, ohio, and Mizzou are looking in. Mizzou is interesting in that even if
they beat Bama, their computer numbers are suggesting that it won’t be
enough to lift them into the title game over an Oregon or FSU…That to me
doesn’t make complete sense and I’ve only seen that in one place…more on
that in the BCS Mess….
- Depression – Oh, so many depressed slappys
who’s hopes and dreams are crushed with each opposing TD and demoralizing
loss…..NWU, Georgia, Gatorland, Game Cocks, Trojans and Horned Frogs to
name a few….
- Acceptance – Kansas. They have to accept the fact that Jabba
the Hut is their coach and nothing will change until he does.
It’s out, so
let’s cut to the chase:
Rank
|
Team
|
Record
|
Rank
|
Pts
|
%
|
Rank
|
Pts
|
%
|
Avg
|
Avg
|
Last
Week
|
1.
|
7-0
|
1
|
2615
|
.9962
|
1
|
1544
|
.9961
|
.960
|
.9841
|
--
|
|
2.
|
6-0
|
3
|
2401
|
.9147
|
3
|
1410
|
.9097
|
.980
|
.9348
|
--
|
|
3.
|
7-0
|
2
|
2520
|
.9600
|
2
|
1482
|
.9561
|
.880
|
.9320
|
--
|
|
4.
|
7-0
|
4
|
2321
|
.8842
|
4
|
1382
|
.8916
|
.790
|
.8553
|
--
|
|
5.
|
7-0
|
6
|
2026
|
.7718
|
7
|
1184
|
.7639
|
.930
|
.8219
|
--
|
|
6.
|
6-1
|
8
|
1952
|
.7436
|
8
|
1117
|
.7206
|
.760
|
.7414
|
--
|
|
7.
|
6-0
|
7
|
2008
|
.7650
|
6
|
1186
|
.7652
|
.630
|
.7200
|
--
|
|
8.
|
6-0
|
5
|
2038
|
.7764
|
5
|
1255
|
.8097
|
.550
|
.7120
|
--
|
|
9.
|
6-1
|
10
|
1616
|
.6156
|
10
|
913
|
.5890
|
.670
|
.6249
|
--
|
|
10.
|
7-0
|
9
|
1662
|
.6331
|
9
|
981
|
.6329
|
.600
|
.6220
|
--
|
Idle Thoughts From Saturday
-Sparty that
close…to PURDUE? -Are they suddenly somehow getting better or something?
-Purdue I mean?
-Gatorlander just complained about “warm ice” in his cocktail and requested more…ice….
-“Warm Ice?” I had to ask…
-“You know, it’s ice that’s melted down too small and isn’t doing anything…”
-I assumed he had a degree from Florida…maybe I was wrong? Or not….
-An oxymoron is a term that uses an unlikely adjective to describe itself and produces an incongruous or “false” statement: ie – Jumbo Shrimp, Anticipated Serendipity, Sparty Intelligence…(see –I have to explain that stuff for all the Spartan’s reading)
-(You KNEW I was going there…didn’t ya’????)
-Gatorland doesn’t respect ANYBODY….
-Maybe Bama
-These fans are still living in the Urban Legend years…
-That’s pretty clear down here.
-Hey, if Mizzou wins it all, you know, beats Bama….Does that make them number 1 after starting the season ranked in lower than 15?
-Tennessee-USC game is shaping up to be a good one.
-Butch Jones is going to have that team playing better in another year or so..
-Meaning winning more…
-Ole Ball Coach goes DOWN!
-I’m nervous about IU…
-Isn’t that sick?
-Used to be a W for the W/L column and look towards next week…
-Now, not so much…
-Great, I can’t find a tiki bar in Siesta Key that gets the BTN.
-Transplanted Bartender just expressed his hate for the BTN…
-Because Sparty is on there a lot and this particular tiki hut doesn’t get the BTN..
-One bartender “THINKS” there might be a bar back in Sarasota that does…
-And he’s sure that the BW3’s has it…or he’s “pretty sure”
-Another Oxymoron…”I’m almost 100% certain…” That’s kinda’ like being a little pregnant…ya’ know?
-Okay – Michigan nation is keeping me in the loop via texts. About 100 on the day to be exact.
-Big Thanks to the Tailgate Crew on that front!
-Beer is really cold here in Florida…maybe that’s because it’s 90?
-I know fans at the game are freezing their collective hiney’s off…And it was a little sparse, Michigan fans….
-Protesting the 3:30 start time?
-I don’t blame you..I can’t as I’m not there, either.
-Gardner is passing the lights out. And I’m seeing highlights on TV’s all around me….
-I can see why if you don’t LIVE in BTN land, you kind of HATE the BTN.
-Hoo-boy….don’t look now but A&M in Trouble….
-I’ll bet Wiscy would like that ASU game back…Just cause.
-I know it doesn’t mean anything for the B1G….
-Michigan can’t be stopped by IU…but neither can they STOP IU….
-I was looking for an oxymoron to fit there…can’t find one.
-Wait – “Offensive Defense”?
-Works for me…
-Why can’t we stop IU? WHERE’S THE BTN? DAMMIT!!!!
-I know…Nobody knows the troubles I have…
-Sweating in the shade and my beer’s getting warmer faster than I can drink it…
-I need to find a friendly place for the 8:00 game..
-Too many Red Sox fans down here…
-Finally found a place that has the BTN…but had to drive.
-Of course, Michigan game over.
-Tigers coming on. I don’t like the looks of this…too many Bo-Sox in this place…
-FSU-Clemson off to a fast start.
-Holy smokes…this thing could be over before the half.
-If I’m Clemson, I’m angry….
-If I’m a Detroit Fan, I can’t STOP thinking about game 2….
-And that passed ball in Game 4.
-Tigers done…When are they going to put it all together?
-Is it Leyland?
-Notice how I’ve made it this far and I have NOT MENTIONED FRED AND BARNEY?
-Because they still are Fred and Barney. They need to beat somebody else before they lose that moniker…
-Preferably on the road…Sparty….
The Hot Seat
Brooklyn
Decker carries over for a 2nd week!
It’s been awhile since we haven’t had a new nominee hold serve and we’ll
see what the Hot Seat Mascot for Week #8 Natasha Poly can do! A Victoria’s Secret Model and she’s not
looking to shabby!
GONE LIST:
(It’s not the EARLIEST we’ve ever had a gone list….but it’s the earliest
“in season” we’ve had a Gone List…)
- LANE KIFFIN
- Paul Pasqualoni
- Treadwell
Hot Seat Rank
- Hazell: I know it’s his first year…but Purdue is
really, really bad…
- Weiss: Why not?
This week…there’s another reason…..
- Snyder: Look out…Grandpa Jokes are going to
start flying….
- Holgorensen: Moves down a little…but had better find
a consistent offense
- DABO: Losing that big has to get you on the
list…and He might move higher…
- Richt – Wow…Again, injuries are
tough….
- STOOPS: How do you lose to this guy right below
you?
- Biliema: Arkansas Nation does not like getting
blanked by Bama…
- Mack Brown: Definitely falling fast and will be off
the list if he keeps winning….
- Mullens – Mississippi State…Still ofer….
FMQ Betting Results:
Went a little lighter than normal this week as I
felt there were too many “things” that should start happening in the college
football upset world. We’ll take stock
again next week and see if we can get a little heavier in order to make our
goal of doubling up.
Bama (-28) @
Arkansas: Take Bama and lay the 28 for $70
WIN! BANK
$133
WSU @ Oregon
(-37): Take the Ducks and lay the 37 for
$60
WIN! BANK
$114
LSU (-7) @ Ole
Miss: Man….If I would JUST FOLLOW MY OWN MATH!Take LSU and lay the 8 for $30
LOSE….
Gators @ Mizzou
(-3): Take
Mizzou and lay the 3 for $30
WIN! Bank $57
UCLA (+5) @
Stanford: Take
UCLA and the 5 for $40
LOSE…..
Indiana (-9) @
Michigan: Take Michigan and lay the 9 for $30
WIN! BANK
$57
Starting BANK: $1,063.50
TOTAL WIN: $361
BANK: $1,425.50
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