Friday, October 5, 2018

The FMQ Week #6: The Longer It Goes...the Crazier It Gets


Some Insane, Crazy Crap has been going on lately...
Only In Bama!!
Mike DuBose, a former Alabama defensive lineman and head coach, is being treated for non-life threatening injuries after accidentally shooting himself.
The incident happened shortly before 2 p.m. Monday, according to WSFA 12 News, when he was struck in the torso by a single .38 caliber handgun bullet.
DuBose accidentally shoots himself doing yardwork, per report
The Opp (Alabama) Police Department did not give details of how the incident happened, only denying media reports that it was the result of a hunting accident. 
 “50% Pass And 50% Run Is Not Balanced.  It’s 50% Stupid”
I like Mike “The Pirate” Leach.  I really do.  He’s good for College Football and other coaches could learn from him.
“I want all the positions to touch it. There’s nothing balanced about 50 percent run and 50 percent pass. Because that’s 50 percent stupid. Now what is balanced is when you have five skill positions and all five are contributing to the offensive effort in a somewhat equal fashion, then that’s balanced. But this notion that if you hand it to one guy 50 percent of the time and you throw it to a combination of two guys the other 50 percent of the time and you’re balanced and you proudly pat yourself on the back and tell yourself that — and people have been doing that for decades — well you’re delusional.”
PSU Helicopter Buzzes Tailgaters in Attempt to “Break Up” Unruly Crowd
This story makes absolutely no sense.  PSU officers flew a Police Helicopter low over an “unruly” group of tailgaters in an effort to get them to disperse.  Four hours before the game.  First of all, what the hell do you think tailgaters before the biggest game of the season are going to be other than unruly?  And secondly, who the F@#$% was complaining that they were unruly, other than the police?
This is a classic situation of the law simply needing to walk away and the crowd will, believe it or not, probably self-manage and also let some people know when they’re getting out of hand.  When the law enters the equation, you suddenly have sides. 
And where this was probably caused by a handful of disruptive fans, there were hundreds of law-abiding fans that were put in harm’s way. 
You can bet the ole MMQ will be tracking this one.  Over-enforcement at a football tailgate is dumb.  No one is there to hurt anyone, until someone creates an opportunity to hurt someone.  
To the Pilots reading:  Is that even legal for law enforcement/authority to do?  Is this an FAA incident? 
Satan “Slams” the Student Body For Not Attending “Blow-Out”
Chalk it up to not getting his way (as he always does), Satan lashed out at the students for not showing up to a game that was 49-0 at halftime.  Seriously?  Can you blame the students or the fans for showing up to a lame-game like that?  Schedule some real teams and your absence problems will go away...
Because students didn’t show up in droves for this one game, Saban suggested offering their tickets to the general public.
“Me, personally, I think it ought to be first-come, first-serve,” Saban said. “If they don’t want to come to the game, they don’t have to come. But I’m sure there’s enough people around here that would like to go to the games, and we’d like for them to come too because they support the players.
I-I-I Chief Glaringly ABSENT As The First NCAA Hoops Trial Gets Underway
Not surprising, really, that the Head Idiot-In-Indy is not at the Hoops Scandal Trial in New York.  Good article pointing out how the I-I-I is trying to look the other way on this one as its biggest gravy train goes under the microscope.  Can you imagine 15-20 of the top 30 programs in the country going on NCAA Tourney suspension at the same time if they find enough supporting evidence?  Nope.  The I-I-I will keep their ostrich heads in the sand on this one…
THE FMQ
And another BAD week.  I don’t get it.  Nobody gets it.  The Purple Kitties were and still are statistically awful.  Michigan should have wiped them up with a mop.  If anyone tells you they know what’s going on this college football season, you can tell them they’re full of it.


So, based on the fact that I screwed up so bad last week and my parlay would have paid off if I would have JUST DONE EVERYTHING OPPOSITE

So, You Got It! 
Opposite Week!
This week’s picks:
Clemson @ Wake Forest (+20):  Wake Forest has been pretty efficient this season, and they play better at home.   And I’m still not convinced that Clemson is Clemson with close wins against the Aggies and Syracuse.  I really like the points here, but – OPPOSITE WEEK!
Take Clemson and lay the 20 for $25
LSU @ GATORLAND (+2.5):  Call me goofy, but I think this spread is the wrong way.  I actually had to look at it twice. Florida getting points at home...  Let’s not forget that these two teams/schools/fanbases absolutely hate each other.  And LSU screwed Florida during the hurricane fiasco year.  Still, I think LSU may not be as good as advertised.  Making me really want to take Gatorland and the points at home.  OPPOSITE WEEK!   
Take LSU and lay the 2.5 for $25
Iowa @ The Gophers (+7.5):  Hmmmmm…Nobody believes that the Flecker is better at rowing the boat at home than he is on the road?  That Maryland loss looked bad and I watched the replay of that game on the BTN in 60.  (I really love that little feature!  You can almost watch an entire game in 45 minutes!)  Anyway, Iowa seems to own the Gophers and 7.5 isn’t a lot to lay on the road – OPPOSITE WEEK!
Take the Gophers and the 7.5 for $25
The Cornsuckers @ Wiscy (-16.5):  This again looks like a lot of points for a B1G rivalry game.   I wonder if Frosty thinks this is a “winnable” game.  We haven’t heard much out of the fair haired boy this week.  I’m liking the points here as the cornsuckers must have figured some stuff out on defense by now, right?  RIGHT?  OPPOSITE WEEK!
Take Wiscy and lay the 16.5 for $25
Florida State @ Miami (-13.5):  Is Florida State REALLY THIS BAD?  Two TD Dog against a rival?  I’m scratching me head on this one a little as I have to believe that Taggart is going to find a way to win sooner or later.  And these guys all know each other and have probably been trash texting each other all week.  The points look so tempting, but – OPPOSITE WEEK!   
Take Miami and lay the 13.5 for $25
Indiana @ THE Sex Toy University (-26):  Should be a big, emotional let down for THE STU after a nail biter in Happy Valley.    It kind of makes me wonder about this spread. Again, POINTS LOOK SO INVITING!  I just don’t think IU is that bad of a team.  However, OPPOSITE WEEK!
Take THE STU and lay the 26 for $25
Domers @ Va Tech (+7):  So the domers have been doing pretty well against the number.  And they got the MMQ last week when Stanford visited.   And they were road warriors at Wake Forest, racking up nearly 500 yards of offense in the process, proving they can play on the road.  I probably should ride the domer momentum and lay the points, but – OPPOSITE WEE!
Take Va Tech and the 7 for $25
Northwestern @ LNU (-10.5):  Northwestern has to go on the road, which hasn’t been kind to them in the past.  Plus, they’re coming off an emotional loss against Michigan.  LNU has been playing like crap, but still managing to win games, except for the 4th quarter oops against ASU.  And they play better at home.  Can’t think that way because – OPPOSITE WEEK!
Take Northwestern and the 10 for $25
The Red River Shootout:  Texas vs. Oklahoma (-6.5):  HMMMMM….  Seems like a big spread for a rivalry game.  However, Oklahoma has scored at will against just about everyone and I really can’t hold the Army near upset against them because of that Army offense.  Still, this is Texas and they’re not a bad team. OPPOSITE WEEK!.
Take Oklahoma and lay the 6.5 for $25
Satan’s Warriors @ Arkansas (+35):  This seems like a huge spread in a game that’s usually pretty close.  But, Arkansas.   Still, wondering how on earth Arkansas can be “this bad” after being a somewhat competitive team under Brett B.  This is on the road and Alabama always slips somewhere where you least expect it.  I got burned last week laying points with Bama…I learned my lesson, but – OPPOSITE WEEK!
Take Satan’s Warriors and lay the 34.5 for $25
Derks Terps (I don’t know how many more times I’ll get to type that) @ MICHIGAN  (-16.5  O/U:  47.5)  Seeing as how I’ve been right more times than wrong on Michigan this season, I feel confident in this analysis.  Maryland beat Texas, which looks like a better and better team each week, but lost to Temple, allowing them to get nearly 500 yards of offense in the process.  Maryland has two slippery QB’s and I have a feeling this could be a close, low scoring affair.  BUT – OPPOSITE WEEK!    
Take Michigan and lay the 16.5 for $50
Take the OVER for $50
PARLAY!
3 Bet/Team Parlay:   6-1
Michigan – Michigan/Derk’s Terps OVER - Northwestern:  $25
TOTAL BET:  $300
Bank:  $359.5

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