Spoilermakers….Not that there was a season to spoil, mind you, but the way they won…the Boise State Hook and Lateral play is getting more enjoyable to watch every time I see it run successfully by other teams....Gee, I wonder if Michigan ever practices that in the gimmick offense we run....
Are we getting better? No. If I could just forfeit the last 3 now and not watch exactly how we lose, I might be able to stomach it.... Having to watch makes it worse, at least for this fan. Occasionally, I get something on College football Saturday that makes me feel good, but, damn, it’s getting harder and harder to find…Therefore, I will let my mind wander back to a much better November 1st game the day after Halloween:
DATELINE: November 1, 1997. Michigan, undefeated, heads into the final four games of the season with a pesky Minnesota Gopher team coming into the Big House. The air is abuzz with the possibility of running the table, but a Paper Tiger still awaits Michigan the following week - Penn State, also ranked in the top 5 and undefeated. Therefore, overlooking the Gophers, similar to what happened in 1986, when those pesky Gophers came into the Big House and beat an undefeated Michigan team….But, no one wants to read about history in this column…But we DID defeat the Gophers that day and set up the Showdown in Happy Valley on November 8th.
The Rest of the Mess
SPARTY vs. the CHEESEHEADS: Sparty, you are starting to scare me. Lose on all the stats, Time of possession, 1st downs, rush yards, pass yards….And you manage to pull out the win. If you can figure out how to win when you shouldn’t, then you are starting to figure it out…Damn IT!....But SPOILERS and PSU loom large on the schedule….
AUBURN AT OLE MISS: Tubberville will either have to pull a T. Bowden/P. Fullmer and quit or I am guessing he gets shown the door…..
SHORTHORNS – TEXAS TECH: UPSET OF THE DAY! Wow, I couldn’t believe Tech did what they did with time ticking off the clock….WE AIN’T GOING TO KICK NO STINKING FIELD GOAL….Throw for the TD and Lubbock goes nuts…Which upsets the order of the BCS and eliminates the
PUPPY DOGS – GATORLAND: HA! The Frauds of Athens are exposed – And Urban Meyer gets the best of Richy Richt. I don’t know why they try so hard to not say, “The World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party” when everyone knows that’s what it is. Another SEC Team out of BCS contention….
Georgia Tech - FSU: BOWDEN’s Defense Exposed! FSU at 7-1. I wasn’t buying it no matter how much you wanted to sell it….
CREMESICLES vs. GAMECOCKS: The Ole Ball Coach finally got Fullmer fired…Or he quit…Whichever version you want to believe.
PITT - DOMERS: Hee-hee-hee – let’s see. 4 OT’s where no one could score a TD and you lose on your home field….Yes, Domers! Come and join my misery…So, that gives you 3 losses with another possible 2 on the schedule. Can someone, anyone, please tell me how Wuzzles thought he was going 10-2?
BCS STANDINGS:
1. ALABAMA – SATAN – Can this be happening? Really? Or will the SEC find a way to knock him out?
2. TEXAS TECH – This team is scary and could pull off the sleeper Big 12 victory. Have to beat OKIE STATE and win the Big 12 Conference Championship
3. PSU – Just Win OUT JOE PA, Just Win Out….Most likely to happen
4. TEXAS – These guys should be 5…..
5. FLORIDA – They looked good against Puppy Dogs….Should be 4
6. OKLAHOMA – Hoping and praying for some help…
7. USC – Hee-hee-hee….Maybe that win over the Domers will vault you up to number 6…
8. UTAH – Really? Riiiiiiiight….
9. OKIE STATE – Big Game in Lubbock on Saturday….
10. BOISE STATE – See Utah…
IDLE THOUGHTS FROM SATURDAY
1. It’s not getting better…It’s not getting better…It’s not getting better…
2. Michigan just made College Football trivia harder…Or easier...Whichever
3. Is there anyone that can play DEFENSE ON THIS TEAM?
4. Looking for other teams to root for…Say, who needs other teams when you have Michigan Chicks that look like this???? Where have they been hiding these Wolverines, anyway?
5. Or how about this Michigan Chick? Yeah, I know she’s not from Michigan, but Tom Brady’s Hottie Giselle qualifies as a Michigan Chick to me…Okay?
HOT SEAT
This week’s HOT SEAT MASCOT: Laura Prepon from the Nostalgia Based “That 70’s Show”, Seeing as how I got Nostalgic for the 1997 season earlier, it seemed appropriate...and The MMQ has a signed copy of one of the scripts from an early episode…But the reason she’s the mascot should be obvious…If this reason isn’t obvious, please respond in a separate e-mail and I will ‘splain to you…..
1. T. BOWDEN – GONE
2. Fullmer – GONE – Quit before he could get CANNED….
3. Wilingham – GONE ….Another one bites the dust..
4. AMSTUTZ (Toledo) – GONE After Beating Michigan, he gets CANNED.
5. Tommy Tutone – No Conference Title, Bowl is questionable….
6. RICH ROD – If Toledo fired it’s head coach after beating Michigan…Where’s the logic in that???
GETTING WARM:
Ferentz - nuff said on him….
Bill Martin – He’s there until Michigan proves they made the right decision….
The Ole Ball Coach - If his team loses to Fullmer’s Cremesicles…Well, they will be squawking for his head, too…..
Games of the WEEK
1. Texas Tech vs. Okie State: This game will be 70-70 in the 3rd quarter.
2. Michigan at Minnesota – Yeah, doesn’t sound big to you, but it is for the oldest Trophy in College Football….The JUG!
3. BAMA at LMU: Can Les rally the troops and win one for JOE PA?
2. Fullmer – GONE – Quit before he could get CANNED….
3. Wilingham – GONE ….Another one bites the dust..
4. AMSTUTZ (Toledo) – GONE After Beating Michigan, he gets CANNED.
5. Tommy Tutone – No Conference Title, Bowl is questionable….
6. RICH ROD – If Toledo fired it’s head coach after beating Michigan…Where’s the logic in that???
GETTING WARM:
Ferentz - nuff said on him….
Bill Martin – He’s there until Michigan proves they made the right decision….
The Ole Ball Coach - If his team loses to Fullmer’s Cremesicles…Well, they will be squawking for his head, too…..
Games of the WEEK
1. Texas Tech vs. Okie State: This game will be 70-70 in the 3rd quarter.
2. Michigan at Minnesota – Yeah, doesn’t sound big to you, but it is for the oldest Trophy in College Football….The JUG!
3. BAMA at LMU: Can Les rally the troops and win one for JOE PA?
4. PSU at IOWA: FERENTZ could do a lot to save his job here…I doubt he has the personnel to pull off the impossible, however…
5. DOMERS at BC: Always a classic….And I think BC smells blood in the water….
6. FLORIDA AT VANDY: Florida, could trip here, but I doubt it.
5. DOMERS at BC: Always a classic….And I think BC smells blood in the water….
6. FLORIDA AT VANDY: Florida, could trip here, but I doubt it.
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