Sparty Sucks - Again! (October 9, 2006)

New Words for MSU Fight Song
By Dean Glossop, 1985
Revision by Russ Holland, 2006

(Cue the MSU Fight Song Music)

Can't get through the Maize and Blue,
But they still keep trying!
Spartan Teams they always lose,
Never been to a BCS Game!

See State's Defense weakening,
Then hear the Fans exclaim:
"Oh, No! Not Again!
Another Loss for MSU!"

Ah, yes.....Another satisfying victory over the Jolly Green Giants of East Lansing. The Wolverine Juggernaut keeps rolling and the MSU 2006 version keeps finding new ways to not only suck, but make the games they do lose incredibly boring.....But, first some credit. MSU scores the first and second rushing touchdown on Michigan's stingy defense this year - on 60 yards rushing. And, somehow, MSU managed to accumulate over 300 total yards and hold the ball for nearly 28 minutes, normally stats that would indicate a closer game...But, alas, yardage between the 20's doesn't mean much, boys. I was a little upset that the defense let Stanton, who has never beaten Michigan and now never will, get that many yards, especially after referring to us as the "University of Puke" and that Michigan Stadium is the quietest 107,501 fans he's ever heard....Well, when there's not a need for a 12th man, like when Michigan plays Sparty, why do we need to be loud? And if you want to talk about displays that will make you puke (if you're a Spartan) rewatch the Notre Dame Tape - that should do it.

So for the record, of the 99 meetings that have taken place, Michigan has won 66, lost 28 and has tied 5. I would expect that the 100th meeting next year up in Sparty Land will produce a similar and somewhat historic result, but let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Top 5 Things Seen or heard Saturday
5. Cheers at seemingly inexplicable times from the Michigan crowd that rattled both teams. The cheers came during the huddles, as the teams were approaching the lines, and even under center. Why? GO TIGERS! What a way to experience that game as everyone in the stands had a radio or headset on tuned into the other Big Game of the Day - special thanks to the Michigan officials for putting highlights on the Jumbo Tron. A little upset they just didn't start broadcasting the whole thing in the 3rd quarter or so due to the fact that the game in Michigan Stadium was over. Bring on Oakland!
4. Loser sitting behind the MMQ who was a Spartan and also rooting for Ohio State because - and get this - in his words, "I know they are going to beat Michigan." Talk about your double losers....How many other uneducated Sparties are out there hoping for the same thing? It's over between us - now it's time to root for the State of Michigan, Sparty. I wouldn't mind seeing you upset OSU and somehow getting enough victories to be bowl eligible. Michigan will have an opportunity on November 18th to take care of OSU if you can't.
3. Mike Clark's poor Mom and Dad, dressed from Head to Toe in Green and White - having to come back to the MMQ tailgate with an all Michigan crowd in rowdy celebration....That was a new record for Mike leaving the game early in the midst of some of the worst traffic Ann Arbor has ever seen after a game...
Mike --- was it a long ride home?
2. MMQ getting some autographs from players and asking Morgan Trent if he knew how big this win was, he simply stated - "We're not done yet." Chills went down the ole' spine, baby......
1. Sparty female fans seen before the game ..... Two of them were "dragging" a 3rd by her toes into the Big House....I guess that's really the only way you can watch Sparty Ball at this point---or the Spartan co-eds were just getting ready for action later - it's really hard to tell with them.......

So- without adding insult to injury and kicking you when you're down, just one more thing:

LOSERS!!!!!

On to other Big Games last week:

GATORLAND - All right boys! You are definitely holding up your end of the bargain. I predicted, in the Pre-Season Special, that this team would be in the National Title Game against Michigan. And you are making a strong statement after soundly defeating what everyone was saying was the best team in the SEC. LSU just didn't have it. Now, you have to go into Tiger Land to play one pissed off Auburn Team....Part 2 of the Month of Terror for FSU...

HuskerNation - You Beat up on Iowa State and are looking ahead to Texas - probably - but you still have to beat K-State....

Va Tech - Well, I see that you can stay even in the polls when you DON'T PLAY.....Maybe that should be your strategy this week - Just Kidding - but look out for the Boston College boys....They can hang with anybody

Honorable Mentions:

Tennessee beats the worst 5-0 team,Georgia, in Georgia's home stadium....
David Ball breaks Jerry Rice's collegiate TD reception record and leads New Hampshire to victory
J.Moran for adding additional readers to this rant - Thought I forot about you -didn't ya'?
It seems that the curse of being #1 has moved to the curse of being #2.....So far, the #2 teams have lost this year - Texas, Notre Dame, Auburn...

Questionables
West Virginia - if and when these guys ever play somebody, it will be interesting to see how good they are. Combined record of teams they have beat - 7-14.....But when I look at the top 5 at this point, I am not sure there is a team in there that West Virginia can beat on a regular basis. May apply for the rest of the Top 10 as well.....

This week:
Showdown in Happy Valley. PSU gets a gift from the officials in the Magical Mystery Dome and looks for HOME FIELD REVENGE on the Wolverines after we were the only team to defeat them last year.....Talk about your Big Games.....This one will be a nail biter.

MMQ