Oh Sh*t....Season's Over...(9-4-07)

All,

I was temporarily stranded on a deserted island for the last 72 hours without phone, cable, internet and paper news media.....Can anyone tell me the score of the Michigan App. State game?

Thanks, MMQ

Okay - I am officially off suicide watch - thank you for all the inquiries and letters of support.....

Michigan, even running the table, cannot possibly be considered for a Championship berth....I am not sure how they get considered for a BCS berth over any other 1-loss team.....so, what are all the guys that came back playing for? Pride? I doubt it.....I think we will probably lose 3-4 more games this season because no one will want to get hurt and blow their pro prospects.....That's what I think......And the Michigan program will start losing juniors left and right if they believe they can't play for a National Title....This could be the beginning of the end for this once mighty program.....I am considering burning all my Michigan memorabilia becoming a USC fan.....

That noise you heard coming from Ann Arbor?
Bo Schembechler rolling over in his grave, actually clawing his way out of the ground to kick some Wolverine butt this week......

My wife commented on Saturday that it wasn't like we lost to Eastern, which I had to explain to her would have actually been BETTER than losing to this App State team. If you are a fan, you better come up with a good comeback to "Hey, Michigan, you lost to a Division II School....." Some ideas:
"Yeah, but we still regularly kick your butt."
"What's your record against the Mighty Maize and Blue?"
"Uh, excuse me, but does your program lead all NCAA football teams in winning percentage?"
"All right, care to wager on the rest of the season?"
"Yeah, but PS3 with NCAA 2008 playing these two teams on the computer had Michigan winning 71-3"......and lastly,
"Uh, yeah, we suck.....
While all of these comebacks sound like sour grapes (except for the last one), they will help put Sparty, Domers, and other fans back in their place, but it will take YEARS to overcome this...Lifetimes.....Speaking of years, the unfortunate thing is that the Michigan kids don't even know what they have done. When they are 52 and it's 2037 and they bring this class back for it's anniversary, you know what they are gonna say? Hey - wasn't that the team that lost to App State - the school that doesn't exist anymore?

What is the Magnitude of this upset and what can you compare it to? How can we put this loss into perspective? Let's count:

1. This is like a 1-seed in the NCAA tournament losing to the 16-seed...
2. This is like the Lions winning the Super Bowl...
3. This is like Northwestern (or MSU) winning the National Football Championship in the modern era....Or Michigan Men's Basketball winning the title again....
4. This is like the Tennessee Women's basketball team playing any Division 1 Men's team in exhibition - and winning....
5. This is like the US Olympic Hockey team beating the Russians in 1980....
6. This is like ME, the MMQ, a 14-16 handicapper going out and beating Tiger Woods in a straight up 18 hole Match at Augusta...

For Non-athletic related comparisons:
1. This is like Ron Paul winning the presidency as a write in....
2. This is like Perot winning on the independent ticket in 1992
3. This is like KIA becoming the number one seller of Automobiles in the USA
4. This is like a small upstart software company creating a windows competitive package and taking over Microsoft......

All kidding aside here are some noteworthy comments/observations:
1. Michigan has not won a game since Bo died - This is a coincidence - maybe, but I will feel better when they put a W on the board.....
2. Michigan has collectively given up nearly 1350 yards in the last three games they played, compared to, if you recall, a total of 88 yards rushing through 7 GAMES last season......
3. Apparently, App State has been trying to get games with ACC, Big East and even SEC opponents who have all shied away from them....(did you hear that Bill????). Well, my guess is they just royally screwed up their chances to get a game with any of them at this point....so much for big paydays (Michigan gave these guys $400,000 to be a door mat, and they let them win........)

The Blame

There is so much of this to go around, that I don't even know where to begin. But let's do it anyway...
1. Bill Martin. What moron schedules a game that cannot benefit the University or the program at all? Even as a tune up, they aren't representative of teams we are going to face in the rest of the non-conference or conference for that matter. Better to schedule a BIG NAME SCHOOL, pump the team up and if you lose, you take your lumps and move on....but now, what have we gained? Nothing, absolutely nothing....and we have LOST EVERYTHING that this program has stood for in one game....Bill Martin, you can turn in your resignation anytime. Thanks for your effort.
2. Lloyd - the L stands for Losing - Carr......Yeah, he stood up and took it, but I didn't hear anything about why we were unprepared, why we underestimated this team, and where the lack of pride in being a Michigan Man went.....My brother in law informed me that while golfing on one of the 23 courses in Hilton Head in July, the guy he was golfing with noticed his Michigan head covers and commented that he would point out the house that Lloyd just purchased a few months ago....his retirement home. Lloyd, if you're going to retire, go now and let us salvage the season.....I have been an apologist for you too long. I have no more excuses....Yes, you are to blame for this loss and the 1997 season seems like a long time ago.......See ya and thanks for the memories....
3. Assistant coaches - Look, you know you have to keep these kids focused....They all read the papers and know that Vegas was too afraid to try and put a spread on this game....Those are things you need to continuously make kids aware of that it doesn't matter. This team is looking at this game, had it circled, and worked all summer to make the most of this opportunity....You had better not go out and lay an egg in front of the home crowd on opening day....
4. The Offense - Yes, you were offensive....OK, Hart, I'll give you a little credit....Henne, I am ready for you to graduate. While you have played great in some big games, you are inconsistent....You will probably be the NEXT Lions draft pick once they figure out that Stanton sucks....
5. The Defense.....You are slow, you didn't attack and the quarterback wasn't touched, as near as I could tell from listening to this on the radio (THANKS COMCAST), for the entire first half.....
6. The fans - this one included - maybe not treating this game properly. I did pull out the sacred flag at half-time and set it up in my drvieway....I considered repeating an accident involving a sealed, unopened fifth of Big Game in my garage before the opening game of last season, but I didn't do it.....A report from some of the regular tailgate attendees stated that the team was not welcomed with it's regular excitement....But how could we? It's Labor Day weekend and we are playing a D-II school....Who wants to get up for that? Come on, this fan still blames Martin for his non-participation....You schedule somebody worthwhile, and I will be there in full colors....

Everyone else who played this weekend and handled your preseason foes, congrats. It looks like you all got through cupcake weekend unscathed and ready for the real season to begin. I will now change this report to include Michigan at the end after the Division 1 report and the MAC report......Michigan is no longer worthy of being the first mentioned.....

MMQ